What The Heck is a Life Coach Anyway??

What The Heck Is A Life Coach Anyway??

By: Kelly Kirschke CLC

This question comes up often during my social interactions.
I don't think anyone means any harm by asking this. I mean, if I am not a
counselor, or an actual therapist, then what exactly am I doing for people? And what makes me qualified at all? Is my life so perfect that it gives me the
authority to inject the masses with my expert opinion? Hardly.

The truth of the matter is that I have made more mistakes
and judgement errors than I care to speak about in my 52 years on this earth.
And, as long as God allows me to keep living and breathing here, I imagine that I will continue to do so. Except now, I have learned some things along the way that have allowed me to be more empowered within myself to handle the errors of my human status a lot more effectively.

This learning process did not happen overnight, and I continue to learn every single day. And, I had plenty of help from others. You see, I have been to therapy. I have been in counseling for a few issues that I needed to get straight.

What was pointed out to me during
these sessions is that often the problems that I experienced were simply a
matter of balance. Meaning that, often, my personal strengths were so off
balance that they became my weakness.

I like to take care of people. When I was a little girl if
you asked me what I wanted to be when I grow up I would say "a mommy"....and "a doctor." I really do experience joy giving to others. I love to cook for people. I like to give gifts. I enjoy connecting and spending time. I have a drive to reach out to those in need. One of my counselors used to call me "the nurse." This giving nature is a good trait. However, when added to a big dose of naïve (which I tend to be), you get a formula of attraction that produces chaotic results. I used to just believe anything someone told me. It never crossed my mind that they may be trying to take advantage or manipulate me in some way. I just assumed that everyone had good intentions. I had no boundaries. I ignored red flags. Then when those red flags would slap me in the face, I was already in knee deep. What an insane cycle.

The good news is, It doesn't happen anymore. Understand,
this is a fairly new statement that I can make. Within only the last few years.
And oh my, do you find out who is who when you finally start standing up for
yourself on a regular basis. It can be painful, but well worth it. That pain
turns to delight when you discover that you have entirely more supporters than naysayers. Suddenly, your law of attraction changes and more and more good friends and influences come from out of the woodwork.

I will never be perfect.
I make plenty of mistakes. I can honestly say that I never set out to intentionally cause harm. I do my best to mend my errors when allowed the room to do so. The difference now, is that most of those that I surround myself with allow me that room to be human. Just as they are also human.
And I allow this status of myself as well. I create and follow through
on my personal boundaries. I make it a point to examine myself daily.

So, again...what is this life coach that you speak of?

A life coach is someone that empowers others to reach their full potential. To
overcome the hurdles that get in the way of their goals. This is done by active
listening, powerful questioning, empathizing and validating the client. Also,
the presentation of methods and skills that the client may have never been
exposed to. A support system for those wanting to work on issues in their life.

The idea first was presented to me from a friend of mine who
is a counselor. After one of our chats about life stuff she kindly said that I
should help others overcome some of the obstacles that I have. She suggested the idea of life coaching. Then I remembered that the last counselor that I had seen also suggested a couple of times that I should give back by showing others what I had learned. It took me a few years after that talk to take the steps needed to obtain my certification. My husband being the final push that I needed.
I had been mulling it around for a long while. Checking out different programs,
and trying to decide. I remember the day well when he said "baby, you need to do this." I am so happy that I did. I look forward to wherever this all takes
me.

Just about 2 years in practice and I can say that it has enhanced every
aspect of my life and the life of my family. To say that it is rewarding is an
understatement. To see people enlightened to things that they were not aware of, and watching them put those things into action in their lives is amazing. I literally get goosebumps sometimes. They do the work. I just dig up the greatness that is already inside of them.

Everyone needs that sometimes. We all have "stuff". We are all made up of good and not so good experiences. It is a big part of what makes us who we are.

It is easy to accept the positive experiences and share those things with others. Right?

As odd as it may sound, the negative experiences can be great
opportunities to grow and reach out to others in a positive way.

That is what I am trying to do with my "stuff."